“Ronke Bewaji Shonde, a woman in her mid-thirties, was found lifeless on the floor of her sitting room. She is believed to have been murdered by her husband, Lekan, who is now on the run.
According to reports on Nairaland, Neighbours had to forcefully open the door when their hired help came in the early hours of yesterday morning but was unable to. Upon opening the door, they found her body bruised and battered with blood seeping from her head.
As at the time of this report, the most probable cause of death was from blows received from her husband during a dispute. He later escaped leaving their children to find her body.
Ronke is also said to have suffered domestic violence in her husband’s hands for many years but chose to stay on in the marriage.”
(This is as reported by bellanaija.com)
Domestic violence has claimed the lives of so many individuals and this beautiful woman is the latest victim. The story is all over the internet. It is sad and unfortunate. What worries me more is the children she has left behind. What they have been through at such tender ages; and then being locked up in the house with their mother’s corpse, trying frantically to wake her up! I can’t even imagine it! The trauma of that, I’m sure will linger for a while. It’s so sad!
This makes me wonder, is it really worth it? Life is so delicate. If you are a woman reading this and are currently experiencing domestic violence, what are you waiting for??? Think about your children, what will be their fate should something happen to you. What life they’ll have without a mother! Think about your family members and friends who truly love you; think about God’s plan and purpose for your life being cut short and unfulfilled. Is that what you want???
The society you’re worried about does not care about you; they will talk no matter what you do. Whether you choose to stay or you choose to leave, people will always have something to say!
Or perhaps, you think the situation will improve and your abuser will change. Who says you have to be a part of that change process? Children should never be put in an abusive situation or be expected to remain in one while the abuser learns to control his temper.
If you’re worried separation is against God’s will for your marriage, know that domestic violence is in stark opposition to God’s plan for families. Genesis 1 and 2 depict marriage as a one-flesh, helping relationship. Ephesians 5:21 talks about mutual submission. Ephesians 5:22-24 explains a wife’s submissiveness to her husband, while verses 25-33 talks about a husband’s self sacrificial love for his wife. 1 peter 3:1-7 gives similar instructions. 1 Corinthians 7:4 says, “The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own body but yields it to his wife.” The two belong to one another and are called to love one another as Christ loved us. Marriage is an image of Christ and the Church. Domestic violence is a far cry from the character of Jesus. Following God involves serving others, not manipulating and controlling them.
Those who are currently in a domestic violence situation should do everything to get out safely. I know you want your marriage to work; you believe God can turn things around through prayers. I believe it with you, but please do so from a safe place. Remember Ecclesiastes 10:10b – “Wisdom is profitable to direct.”
Domestic violence involving children is also condemned by God. Psalm 127:3 says, “Children are a heritage from the Lord, offspring a reward from him.” God entrusts parents with children, and those parents are to lovingly care for them and train them up. Ephesians 6:4 says, “Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord” . Children are to obey their parents and discipline is important. But discipline is distinctly different from violence and abuse.
Domestic violence hurts the heart of God. He is not unmoved by its victims, nor has He abandoned them. His plan for human relationships – particularly those among family – is a beautiful depiction of who He is. Family is meant to reflect God’s love. It saddens Him when a home turns into a place of pain. God’s desire for those involved with domestic violence – both victims and abusers – is healing and wholeness. Don’t stay stuck in it; get to a safe place while you still can!
Photo credit: bellanaija.com